I'm back! From where, you ask? A carpentry/motherhood/birthday party black hole that has left me not even one second to shower - shocking, I know - or God forbid, paint my toenails. I actually painted just two toenails on each foot the other night before heading to a party. That's actually not completely true. I painted said two toenails IN THE CAR on the way there. Those four toes were the only ones that showed through my strappy sandles. But then I did what I always do. Tell everyone I know when they said my toes looked nice, that I only...